Comment By Aunt Linda On Father's Day

Dear Paul,

A successful life is one that is remembered fondly and inspirationally by those we leave behind. One that has had such an impact that it is lovingly shared with those who are dear but never knew us. I remember your Dad's intelligence, creativity, the gleam he got in his eye when he spoke of Italy and anything Italian and humorously the tone of his voice when he said De Lor' Es when he impatiently wanted to get her to leave a party and head home.This was a beautiful tribute to him. Thank you for sharing, I am sure he will be with you in spirit tomorrow.

Love Aunt Linda

Happy Father's Day Papa

Dear Dad,

I just wanted to write this letter to tell you how much I love you. I know you already know this. There was never a time we didn't say it and show it. We were never ashamed to give each other a big kiss and a hug. Although I have tears right now, and miss you terribly, I want you to remember that we will always love you and you are with Susan, Mom and me every day in everything we do. We can't get together or have a conversation in which your name or a story about you doesn't come up. Usually it has something to do with food, cooking, mushrooms, bamboo (mom doesn't like that topic), or one of many things you used to say that ring true every time we repeat them. As I get older Papa, I don't know how you did what you did. Your passion, intelligence, hard work. Of course I know now you couldn't have done any of it without Mom and even at 72, she continues to take better care of us than we can her. Every day, I fail miserably trying to be half the man you were but I never give up because I know you are inside of me and this gives me the courage to keep trying to be a better man. I know you're proud of Susan because I am too. She's a great Mom and has so many of your never ceasing inquisitive and creative qualities. And of course your grandson Francesco is so smart and growing too fast. I wish I could slow it all down just a bit. Karina is a beautiful young woman and Biagio an amazing young man. I can see the smile they still put on your face. I try to keep the promise I made to you when you left us, to look after Mommy and Susan but the truth is, they take care of me, by far, more often and better than I could ever care for them. They're the two most important women in my life and I have this to thank you for as well. I hope you hear me when I talk to you often, I certainly hear you when you respond because whenever I ask you a question, I know the answer you would have given me and it gives me endless comfort and guidance.

Thanks dad for being such an amazingly unconditional loving father and for being the best dad I could ever have wished for.

Happy Father's Day Papa

Love your son,

Paul

I'm posting several photos of my father when he was a young boy growing up in Italy. I received them recently from my cousin Mariangela who discovered them in Italy and was kind enough to share them with me and my sister. Although I'm uncertain about who some of the other people in the photos are, several show my dad with his parents, brother and friends. As you can see, he always dressed well and was handsome and full of life, love and a never ending thirst for knowledge. He left his beloved country and family to come to America and start his own family and pursue his career as a medical doctor specializing in Psychiatry. Never the stereotypical Psychiatrist, he was born with an intuition about the human mind and could see your soul through your eyes but never made you feel uncomfortable. He was real and loved to share his passions with others.

I had always admired Paul and his father's relationship and could only have dreamed of one like that. One day we were all in Pennsylvania at your parents house and my father stopped by on his way to look at my sister's new house, your parents being who they are, set up an old Italian lunch, which in itself brought my father back to family. We sat and talked and then your father read my father a poem, it was the poem you posted (Patria Mia). I had never before seen my father cry. That day was a life changing moment for both of us. It took a while and some serious working on, but after that day I have that relationship with my father that I always wanted, your father told my father it was OK to love your son, His words were "if I cannot show affection to my children, then how will they learn to show affection to someone else". I love you both and your family so very much, you all have my eternal gratitude. Thank you, for sharing such a wonderful man with so many of us that knew and loved him. He will always be one of my heroes. (Written by Anthony Leto)

Thanks to my sister Susan, I have more pictures of our dad and records of his poetry that I will be posting when I find the time. The two photos I'm posting here are of me and my papa. The first is 1966 when I was two in my feet pajamas giving dad a kiss goodnight. The second is of my dad and me in his Nissan 280Z which became my first car. I loved that car but I loved him much more and these photos really make me feel great. We were so lucky to have our dad as long as we did and although I wish he were still here healthy and happy, I know there are so many people in life that never had the chance to have their mom and dad for as long as we did giving us security and unconditional love. Thanks sis.

O PATRIA MIA - O MY MOTHERLAND

Remembering My Dad

Written By Susan M. Valvo

http://susan-myjourney.blogspot.com/

My Father was a man that loved his Motherland. He was born in Messina in 1925 and from infancy was raised in Cinquefrondi, Reggio Calabria. He studied medicine and came to the United States...he left behind his parents his brother and his Motherland. He met and married my Mother and they lived in New Jersey and raised my brother and I. My father always instilled in me a deep and profound love for the Motherland that oozes from our veins. Aside from being an extremely skilled physician, my Father loved to write his thoughts and feeling on paper. I wonder what he would have done if he had the pleasure of living long enough to have his own blog!My Father passed away in 2002 at the age of 77. Among the many memories he left us is a powerful collection of his thoughts and feelings...on paper! I wanted to share one of his poems with you...I hope you enjoy it! I hope it moves you as it moves me!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

O Patria Mia

By Paolo D.Valvo M.D.

_______

Italia, O Patria Mia

Madre feconda di si’ nobile parole,

Il tuo desio m’assale

Se la vision di te mi torna al cuore.

Vedo I tuoi monti austeri,

Il mare accarezzar le dolci sponde,

I vasti piani e laboriosi campi

Dove perenne par che v’ondeggi il grano.

Dall’alpi alla trinacria

Dall’una all’altra sponda

D’insigne tua progenie

L’opra sublime annonda,

E l’ecodella Gloria

Di tua Romana gente

Nell’aere spande

Qual luce che risplende,

Ovunque l’occhio vaghi

Bella tu sei o cara patria mia,

Bella nel corpo e l’alma,

Si dolce, si’ desiata Madre Mia!

Potessi ancora mirare

L’azzurro del tuo mare…

O potess’io vagare

Ancor sulle tue sponde…

E poi ancor mirare

Le cupole tue belle…

Sentir le tue campane

Scoccar nel cielo al vespro!

O Paria Mia Diletta

Pottesse l’esser mio’

Esser da te

Nel tiepido calor del grembo tuo!

Da si’lontana sponda

Spesso al guardar m’indulgo

Di la’dell orizzonte…

Ed il pensier di te

Carezza l’alma mia…

Il sussurrar m’e’ d’uopo:

O Cara Patria Mia!

© 2008 SMVALVO

TRIP TO ITALY WITH MOM AND DAD

I was fortunate to travel to Italy with both my parents during the summer of 1996. The following are photos of my dad in St. Peter's Square in Rome with my cousin Mariangela and one of him walking on the beautiful cobblestone square. Another was taken with his brother, my uncle Turi who has since passed . It had been a long time since they had seen each other. It was great for me to visit my family in Italy and especially to visit the land where my father was born and grew up. Italy is so beautiful.

CHILDHOOD PHOTO

This photo was sent to me by my sister Susan, It is one of the only photos I've seen of our father as a young child. He bears a striking resemblance to his grandson (my nephew and godson) Francesco.

STRIKE A POSE

Dad was very dynamic. An extraordinary human being with ordinary human traits. I guess this is one of the things I admire most about him. I understand him better now as I grow older and can only hope to be half the man he was. In this photo, he is posing for a photo standing next to his new Nissan 280Z (he liked his sport cars) and despite the fact that it was the 70's (which explains the clothing) he was always dressed well and fashionable for the times. This shot was taken in front of the pond at my high school. (Delbarton in Morristown, NJ)

REMEMBERING OUR DAD

MY LEONARDO
MY DAD

PAUL DOMENICO VALVO
FEBRUARY 6, 1925 - DECEMBER 31, 2002



IN YOUR SPRING, YOU FLEW LIKE A SPARROW
RUNNING THROUGH THE MOUNTAINS OF ITALY
TO YOUR GRANDFATHER’S CABIN
ALWAYS CURIOUS, INQUISATIVE AND EXPLORING

THE STORIES YOU TOLD US OF THE TIMES WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG
FROGS IN YOUR POCKETS
FAVA BEANS FOR DINNER
NOT GREETING YOUR FATHER WITH A KISS IN THE SCHOOLYARD
THEY ALL SEEMED TO HAVE MEANING

OH WHAT I WOULDN’T DO TO HEAR YOU TELL THEM ONE MORE TIME

IN YOUR SUMMER, YOU BECAME A MAN
HANDSOME, INTELLEGENT, CONFIDENT A DOCTOR
YOU CAME TO AMERICA, TAUGHT YOURSELF ENGLISH,
MET THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE AND STARTED A FAMILY
THE MANY LIVES THAT YOU TOUCHED
THE PATIENTS YOU HEALED
THE INFLUENCE YOU PROVIDED

YOU TAUGHT US ABOUT YOUR INSPIRATION
LEONARDO DAVINCI
ALL OF HIS ACCOMPLISHMENTS
ALL OF HIS TALENTS
“WHAT A GREAT MAN” YOU WOULD SAY

AND LIKE LEONARDO, YOUR MIND HAD NO BOUNDARIES
THERE WASN’T A TOPIC OR SUBJECT YOU COULDN’T ADDRESS
AND YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS WERE EVEN MORE ABUNDANT
SCIENCE, MEDICINE, MUSIC, PAINTING AND ART,
POETRY, PHOTOGRAPHY, MICOLOGY (MUSHROOMS THAT IS)
AND ON AND ON…
CARPENTRY, MASONRY, PLANTS, ANIMALS AND ESPECIALLY PEOPLE
MY DAD THE PSYCHIATRIST

YOUR HOBBIES WOULD HAVE DRIVEN THE SANEST WIFE INSANE
YET YOURS ALWAYS ‘STOOD BY HER MAN’

AND WHEN YOU SPOKE, PEOPLE LISTENED
YOU SPOKE WITH PASSION AND CONVICTION
AND THAT WAS JUST WHEN YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT MUSHROOMS
SOMEHOW, YOU MADE IT ALL SOUND INTERESTING

YOUR EMOTIONS RAN DEEP

YOU AND MOM ALWAYS TAUGHT US TO LOVE EACH OTHER

I NEVER KNEW WHAT YOU REALLY MEANT
WHEN YOU WROTE ABOUT THE SEASONS OF YOUR LIFE

WHAT I WOULDN’T GIVE TO HEAR YOU EXPLAIN IT ONE MORE TIME

AND IN YOUR AUTUM
YOU REAPED THE HARVEST OF YOUR LIFE’S WORK
RESPECTED PROFFESSIONAL, LOVING FATHER AND HUSBAND,
ADORED GRANDFATHER

YOUR INFLUENCE PROFOUND

THE LESSONS YOU TAUGHT
ALL THOSE CLICHES
THEY ALL TURNED OUT TO BE TRUE

IF ONLY I KNEW THEN WHAT I KNOW NOW

FOR YOUR WINTER HAS COME UPON YOU ALL TOO SOON PAPA
AS MUCH AS I REFUSED TO ACCEPT THE INNEVITABLE
THE SNOW IS BLOWING AND THE SUN NOWHERE TO BE FOUND

YOU WERE RIGHT AGAIN

OH HOW WE’LL MISS YOU DAD
BUT YOU WILL ALWAYS BE WITH US IN OUR HEARTS
AND IN OUR MINDS

FOR ANOTHER SPRING WILL SOON BE HERE ONCE AGAIN
AND AS I WALK FIRMLY INTO MY SUMMER
I AM WARMED BY THE MEMORIES OF YOU


MY LEONARDO
MY DAD




WRITTEN BY:
PAUL A. VALVO
IN MEMORY OF MY FATHER,
THE GREATEST MAN I WILL EVER KNOW